謎男方法補充材料4/8

The Mystery MethodGet Attraction MembersBonus Material 4 of 8Hi guys,It』s been a few days since you received our attraction tips. Today』s email course will review that, and then proceed to Qualification (Chapter 7).Review (of Attraction)The most important thing to do after you Open (Chapter 5) is start to build attraction. However, you will not always have the social freedom to jump from your opener into any random, unconnected attraction-building routine. Sometimes you will, especially as your skills develop. But if you』re not able to do this consistently, use a transition.There are three types of transitions:Content transitions – where you take something she says and develop a routine off of thatObservational transitions – where you 「spontaneously」 notice something about her or her group, usually while using non-verbal communication to appear to be about to leave the interaction. This can be something you genuinely notice or it can be a 「cold read」Phrasal transition – which is similar to no transition at all, but allows the use of a crutch like 「that reminds of」 or 「that』s just like when」 to connect two different conversational subjects. Note that there doesn』t actually have to be much of a relationship between these two subjects for this to workThese were covered extensively in the previous email. If you missed it, you can get an even more detailed breakdown in Chapter 6 of Magic Bullets. This is available for free as part of the downloadable sample chapter on the Magic Bullets page.Sometimes it』s hard to keep track of everything that is going on when you first meet a woman, especially the first few minutes and especially while you』re first learning this stuff. Be patient, relax; you』ll get it eventually. For a great comprehensive overview of a master』s thought process and checklist as he goes through the first five minutes, check out The Don and Tenmagnet』s interview entitled (you guessed it) The First Five Minutes (CD version here; instant download here).The previous email also covered Storytelling. Your stories will improve through repeated practice. One of the great things about storytelling (as well as body language) is that you can practice anywhere; you don』t need to wait for a beautiful woman to come along. A key point to remember with storytelling is to embed your DHVs in the story such that:The story would be interesting and a story you could tell even without the DHVsThe DHVs appear to the listener to be incidental to the story and not its main purposeThe best resources for Storytelling are Chapter 18 (Storytelling) of Magic Bullets, which was also reprinted in the Love Systems" Routines Manual, and the interview with Sinn and Future on the subject (CD version here; immediate download here).Discussion (Qualification)Qualification, referred to as A3: Male to Female interest in the book, is a crucially important part of dating science.Psychologically, it』s not enough for most attractive women to feel that just because they are attracted to you, that you are attracted to them. Women want to have to work for your interest. Or at least feel that they are working for your interest. And it』s your job to make sure that they do.The book does a great job of explaining qualification theory, and has a generous number of examples. So for this email, we』ll instead look at some of this basic material from other angles to help internalize the concepts and make them flexible in your skillset. Try this once you are familiar with the basic concept.Levels of QualificationThe list of qualification questions on p. 135 is great. Most of these are what we"d call "hard" qualifiers. A woman is going to have to be pretty interested in you or pretty compliant to answer most of these. [There are some exceptions – "do you like animals" and "how old are you" are softer qualifiers.]What we sometimes find helpful to do is build a ladder of increasing compliance with our qualification questions by starting small (e.g., "are you adventurous"), building up a bit more later (e.g., "if you could be anything, with no fear of failure, what would you be?") and then leading to hard qualifier like: "what do you have going for you apart from your looks?"Each of these qualification questions should be separated by a minute or two of discussion that isn』t obviously screening or qualifying. By doing this, you build momentum toward increasing compliance.Validating the screenThe bait-hook-reel-release model (pp. 151-155) is a powerful tool and must be learned. Sometimes, however, on our bootcamps, we see students who apply it so rigidly that they lose credibility. It』s a good idea to explore your interest in a specific topic before releasing. This is the 「reel」 part of bait-hook-reel-release and it』s easy to gloss over it. However, you must convince her that she has genuinely done something to win your interest. If you ask her what she wants to be when she grows up and she tells you she』s studying at law school, you can』t simply say 「that』s amazing」 and then release her. If it was truly interesting to you that she was in law school, explain why. Were either of your parents lawyers? Did you grow up watching a law-based TV show? Whatever it is, make her feel that she has genuinely won your interest through her answer, and that she would not have gotten the same response with a different answer.Qualification pingingTry qualifying early in your set – when opening for example. Use a very soft qualifier and see if it takes hold. Many men, especially as they become familiar with the principles of dating science, are surprised by how early they get attraction from women. And you won』t know if you don』t test. So start testing whether early qualification works. If she doesn』t bite, just continue with attraction wherever you were.--------------------------謎男方法補充材料4/8翻譯: qinsoon獲得吸引夥計們好！你們應該早就讀過我所寫的關於吸引的章節。我們今天的email教程將會複習這個，之後轉向篩選與合格的話題（第7章）。複習吸引在你完成開場（Open，見第5章）之後，最重要的事情就是建立對女人的吸引力。但是大多數情況你不能從你的開場自由地轉入其他毫無聯繫的建立吸引的慣例中去。也許當你的搭訕技巧達到一定水平後，你可以隨心所欲的話題轉換。但如果你還做不到，這裡就向你提供一些轉換話題的技巧。通常我們把轉換分為三種類型：內容轉換 - 從她說的內容中提煉，並根據此開始你的吸引慣例觀察轉換 - 自然地提出一些關於她或者她所處的團體（組合）的事，通常搭配上非語言上的交流給人造成你即將離開這次談話的感覺。至於你所提出的內容，既可以是你觀察到的，也可以是冷讀的結果。慣用語轉換 - 與不用任何轉換直接切入新話題很類似，使用像「這讓我想起……」「這就像……」等連接語來串起兩個不同的話題。需要注意的是，這兩個話題是否真正有什麼聯繫，並不影響這種轉換方式的行之有效。這些在我的上一封email中也講到了。如果你錯過了上次email教程，你也可以在<Magic Bullets>的第6章中找到更詳細的話題轉換方法的分類。這些可以在<Magic Bullets>的網站上找到，它們作為免費試讀的章節提供下載。當你初次遇見某個女人時，有時很難留意到周圍發生的或是你和她之間的每一件事，尤其在最開始的幾分鐘內或者你是初學搭訕的新人。不過試著放鬆心態，並且堅持學習，你最終定能成功。你也可以去看看The Don and Tenmagnet"s的訪談，叫做「最開始的5分鐘（The First Five Minutes）」，從中你可以學習到大師是如何處理搭訕的最開始的5分鐘的，包括他的思想過程以及他腦中清晰的話題列表。上一封email中也提到了講故事的技巧。你必須通過反覆練習、嘗試、修改，來讓你的故事更加吸引人。對於嘗試學習的人來說，學習講故事（還有就是學習身體語言）有一點優勢——即使不在你的目標美女面前也可以練習，這樣勤加練習可以幫助你快速掌握它們的技巧。對於講故事來說，重要的一點是在你的故事中加入展示你DHV的元素。符合以下條件的，都屬於在搭訕中合適的故事：這個故事本身很有趣，那麼即使其中沒有DHV也可以這個故事讓聽者感覺，是無意的DHV而不是刻意的對於講故事這種技巧，個人感覺最好的資源是<Magic Bullets>的第18章，它也出現在<the Love Systems" Routines Manual>中。也可以看看對Sinn and Future關於這個內容的訪談。關於篩選與合格（Qualification）的討論篩選與合格的問題，我在<謎男方法>的A3：男對女的興趣中講到過，是約會學中重要的一部分。從心理角度來講，對於女人來說，僅僅感覺到你們之間的相互吸引是不夠的。當女人希望確實在迎合你的興趣，或者至少在試圖為你的興趣而付出時，你要做的事就是告訴她們，她們確實這樣做了。這就是所謂的合格聲明。我在書中花了很大工夫闡釋篩選與合格的理論，並且提供了大量例子。所以在這封email中，我們從一些基礎的內容出發，從其他角度來內化這些概念並且讓你可以靈活的運用這些技巧。當你熟悉了篩選合格的基礎概念後，可以嘗試閱讀這些內容。篩選的層次在書中p135頁（譯註：DOC版第65頁）中給出了一張合格問題的列表。其中大多數屬於所謂的「硬」篩選問題。通過它們，女人會表現出對你的興趣或是對你的問題的服從。（像「你喜歡動物嗎」和「你多大了」這些屬於軟篩選問題。）在贏得女人的過程中，很重要的一點是，你需要用這些篩選問題來建立一個逐步提升服從性的階梯，你的篩選問題可以從簡單的軟篩選問題開始（如，「你喜歡冒險嗎」），慢慢提升（如，「如果你可以成為任何你想成為的東西、人、動物，你會怎麼選擇？」），一直到最後提升到硬篩選問題，像「除了外貌之外，你還希望獲得什麼？」每一個篩選問題都可以花一到兩分鐘討論，以判斷對方態度和對於篩選的反應。通過這樣做，你就會逐步得到女人更高的服從性。合格台詞「引誘—上鉤—收線—釋放」模型是一個有效的工具，每個立志於把妹的人都應該學會。有時，在我們舉辦的訓練營中，看到學生僵硬地使用它以至於他們失去了女人的信任。在使用這個模型時要注意，在「釋放」之前應當表露出你對她給出的特定話題的興趣，這就是「收線」的部分，這個經常被學生忽視。不過它很重要，你需要讓女人知道她確實在試圖獲得你的興趣。例如，你問她，當她長大後打算做什麼工作，她告訴你想去學習法律。你不能簡單的回答「這太棒了」，然後就開始「釋放」。如果她讀法律的打算確實獲得你的興趣，你應該告訴她，向她解釋——如，你父母是律師嗎？你喜歡看一些講法律的電視節目嗎？無論對她說什麼，只是讓她知道，她通過她的回答確實贏得了你的興趣，如果她繼續這麼做，也能同樣獲得你的好感。合格迴響在你的搭訕總儘早的進行篩選，例如在開場時。可以用一些軟篩選問題，看試探一下情況。很多人，尤其是那些熟知約會學原則的人，吃驚於他們能在很開始的時候就對女人產生了吸引。不親身實踐，你是不會發現這個的。所以，你可以在今後的搭訕中嘗試更早的進行篩選，看看到底是什麼結果。如果她沒有上鉤，那麼繼續回到吸引的階段進行。
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