歐亞混血兒會經歷什麼(轉載)
人們需要知道混血兒會經歷什麼,他們需要知道,我們需要更多的支持;這周,又一個母親是亞洲人的混血兒的瘋狂行為成為了美國全國性的新聞。這是我的照片。
我的母親是中國人,我的父親是美國白人。我是剖宮產的,出生於紐約弗拉興。我出生後,我的母親因輸血生病了,感染了乙肝,去世了。我父親是個溫順、痴迷於亞洲一切的「傳統主義者」,他不善溝通,不想工作,而我的母親卻撲到他懷裡,為的是融入西方社會和獲得身份地位。
十年後,婚姻以暴力結束,分了卧室,她拚命想把我從父親身邊帶走。 一般亞洲女性不知道的是,雖然她們在融入過程中有特權,但他們的兒子卻沒有。我哥哥34歲,看起來完全是中國人,仍然是一個處男,從來沒有過女朋友。中國人不接受我,而白人女性一再拒絕我,因為我是中國人。即便是亞洲女性和亞裔美國女性對我也不例外。
此後,我絕不尊敬我的母親——完全是因為她與一個討厭我這樣的半亞洲人的種族結婚了,而更糟的是,我父親花了幾年時間試圖迫使我融入「白人」文化。雖然白人到中國生活會很輕鬆,但他所有的朋友都會開玩笑說,中國女孩很容易到手——我為何要為此感到驕傲呢?看起來像亞洲人的半亞洲男孩在什麼樣的世界才能正常生活——當他自己的母親想要一個白人的時候,半亞洲男孩怎樣才能形成健康的自尊呢?
多次聽到「當然你爸是白人」這樣的話語後,我就非常厭惡聽到這些話。很長一段時間,我都拒絕承認自己是中國人;我把頭髮剪短一點,以便讓頭髮顏色看起來淺一點。如果中國和亞洲女性都是出了名的喜歡白人男性——我為什麼要將自己視為中國人呢?她們顯然希望接近白人——所以我嘗試成為白人,但未能成功,因為我的母親將我和哥哥拋棄到了一個種族主義盛行的西方社會,那裡的人們認為我們有個無能的白人爸爸。
儘管擁有亞洲母親的半亞洲人非常多,但他們幾乎都默默無聞,這是有原因的。為什麼三天前有個擁有亞洲母親的半亞洲人在時報廣場瘋狂裸舞,為什麼半亞洲人瘋狂殺戮,這也是有原因的。我們的父母拋棄了我們。「兩個世界的融合」是失敗的,因為它是如此的不平衡。如果他們真的認為,確保孩子能在一個白人至上的種族主義世界中生存的最好辦法是與白人至上主義者生孩子——那最好還是不要生孩子算了。現在,在我的幫助下,建立了一個關於半亞洲人的全球性英語論壇,這將繼續為可預見的未來造勢。我真的很遺憾,只能藉助這樣的方式,但我們當中有太多人都受夠了,我需要亞洲社區的幫助來支持混血男孩
People need to be aware of what biracials go through and that we need additional support; this week was yet another biracial with an Asian mother making national news for insane behavior. This is my picture.
My mother was Chinese and my father a White American. I was born through C-section in Flushing, NY, after which my mother became sick from the blood transfusion and developed Hepatitis B, and died. My father was a meek, racist Asiaphile 「traditionalist」 who has trouble communicating and didn』t want to work, and my mother threw herself at him for integration into Western society and for status.
Ten years later the marriage ended in violence, separate bedrooms, and her desperately trying to take me away from my father. What Asianwomen in general don』t realize is that while they have privilege in integrating, their sons don』t. My brother is 34, looks totally Chinese, and is still a virgin, never having had a girlfriend. Chinese people do not accept me, and white women repeatedly turned me down for being Chinese. Even Asian women and Asian American women did too.
I could never respect my mother after this – for literally marrying into a race that hates half of me, and worse, that my father spent years trying to force 「white」 culture onto me. While a white guy will have an easy time coming to China, all his friends will joke that Chinese girls are easy – why would that make me proud? In what world does it make sense for a half Asian son who looks Asian – would develop health esteem when his own mother wanted a white man?
After the first 100 times I grew sick of hearing 「of course it』s your dadwho is the whiteone.」 For a long time I refused to even acknowledge I was Chinese; I would cut my hair short so it would be a lighter color. If Chinese and Asian women are famous for throwing themselves at white men – why would I want to identify as Chinese? They clearly want white men – so I tried but failed to be a white man, since my mother dumped me and my brother into racist western society with a clueless white dad.
There』s a reason there are almost no successful half Asians with Asian mothers despite being so common. There』s a reason why three days ago a half Asian with an Asian mom danced naked and delusional in Times Square,why half Asians have gone on spree killings. Our parents abandoned us.The 「merging of two worlds」 is a failure as it is so lopsided. If they really, truly believe the best way to ensure that a child can survive in a white supremacist world is to have kids with white supremacists – it might be better to not have kids at all. And now with my help there is a tremendous, globe-spanning English language forum of half Asians all in agreement, and this will continue to build momentum for the forseeable future. I』m truly sorry it has to be this way, but enough of us have suffered and I need the help of the Asian community in supporting biracial sons.
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