雅思寫作漫談之 - 不要一個打十個

來自專欄 馬哥雅思作文批改日記

不少學生會寫這樣的段落

Private cars do benefit our life, due to its convenience and comfort. People who have their own cars could go everywhere they want at any time. This is especially helpful in case of emergencies. For example, If you possess a car, you can send your family members to hospital as soon as possible when they suddenly become ill. In addition, when you take a bus, you may be annoyed by people on it chatting with each other and there may be no seat left for you. But if you get a car, it could be a pleasant journey.

這段話，懵懂少年讀來很順暢， 老司機卻能一眼發現問題所在：一個觀點應該論證完全， 再去論證另一個，而不是幾個一起交代，一起論證。少年， 你不要去一個打十個。

梳理下論證段的結構：

主題句開始

當一段話列舉超過一個觀點時，應該以這樣的主題句開頭

• ... can bring many benefits
• There are several reasons for ...
• ... has some distinct disadvantages

而後要接上觀點句

觀點句和主題句的區別在於：

主題句是告訴你有什麼，觀點句告訴你是什麼

一個主體段的結構是這樣的：

主題句 （...帶來很多好處）+ 觀點句一 ：第一個好處是什麼。一通論證

+ 觀點距二： 第二個好處是什麼。一通論證

打完收工。

本題里就是這樣, 把兩個好處convenience (方便) 和 comfort（舒適）分成兩個觀點寫

Private cars ownership brings many benefits to our life. First of all, private vehicle is convenient. People who have their own cars could go everywhere they want at any time. This is especially helpful in case of emergencies. For example, If you possess a car, you can send your family members to hospital as soon as possible when they suddenly become ill. In addition, driving your own car is much more comfortable than using public transport. When you take a bus, you may be annoyed by people on it chatting with each other and there may be no seat left for you. In comparison, a self - driving journey can be pleasant.

總結一下：

【1】雅思寫作中，應該先論證完一個觀點， 再去論證另一個，而不是把兩個觀點寫在一起， 然後一起論證。

【2】當一段話列舉超過一個觀點時，應該以主題句開頭。

【3】主題句和觀點句不同， 主題句告訴你有什麼， 觀點句告訴你是什麼。

【3】一個主體段的結構是這樣的：

主題句 （...帶來很多好處）+ 觀點句一 ：第一個好處是什麼。一通論證

+ 觀點距二： 第二個好處是什麼。一通論證