Sara: but you DID mention doze off….

24 hours ago

Meeting with family doctor Sara

doc：Lang?

me：Yo Sara, remember me?

doc: We have 2000+ patients so you know

me: o..ok

doc：how are you ?!

me: Im good! how are you?! Business good?

doc: Im good, business is kind of slow though,,, flu season is waning .... not enough sick people

me: i am glad i can help with the number... i am sick .. oh boy Im so sick...

doc (smiling）:so.... what brought you here?

me：i snored a lot

doc: ok... and？

me: which means my sleep quality is less than satisfactory... and i did this laser treatment from this sketchy cosmetic clinic which didnt really work except me being roasted by the freaking hot laser for hours..... i feel like they treat me like Im barbecue meat

doc: (apparently not interested): oh thats interesting....have you ever experienced waking up in the mid of night while having this choking feeling?

me: i dont think my sleep apnea has reached that stage though, but that sounds very cool... and gothic... and cool

doc: have you ever found yourself violently gasping for air?

me: no! never,,, and that sounds like what ppl will do on deathbed.. ... Geez... I remember that』s how Mao died…

doc: so whats your concern,,, except for the snoring part

me: I once doze off when i was driving in highway...

doc: wait... can you repeat what you just said?

me: I SAID I ONCE DOZED OFF WHEN I WAS DRIVING IN HIGHWAY,, HAHAHA ...no biggie... i wake up like in a split of second....

doc ( stern face): Lang... I am sorry to inform you... as a doctor,,, i have this legal obligation to report you to the ministry of transportation since your lack of alertness when you r driving due to possible sleep apnea makes you a hazard to the public. The ministry will notify you within reasonable amount time that you license will be suspended...until your medical condition is ameliorated on this alertness part.

silence..

me: did I say doze off

doc: yes you did

me: Are you sure?

doc: YES

me: it is strange cuz i dont recall that part... i think what i said is ,,,feeling drowsy.. sleepy,,, have to put up this resistance against falling asleep… but the actual falling asleep part didn』t really happen…

doc: but you did mention doze off….

Me (went full panic) : oh come on doc,,, Im first generation immigrant and English is not even my second language,,,, I say random shit all the time…I babble for no reason,, you know.. I don』t know what I am talking about,,,what doze off I have no idea what it means,,, come on doc,, please ,,, cut me some slack

Doc(typing): sorry Lang I am sending this to the ministry right now ,,,, I cant really do much about it.

Me: OH,,,,,NOOOOO,,, PLEASE,,,

Doc: SORRY….

ME: SARA !!!!!!!!!! COME ON !!!!! DONT DO THIS TO ME!!!! I NEED THIS CAR TO GO TO WORK!!!

Doc pressed enter and the report is out.

silence..

Doc(tentatively) : You ok Lang?

Me (collapsed in chair) : Sara… Sara.Sara.Sara…

Doc: you can always take the subway,,, you know

Me: I work in a different city

Doc: perhaps you can take a leave of absence… you know perfectly well that the way you drive can get people killed…. give some thought to that…

Me: then how am I supposed to pay the bills,,, I might end up homeless and If that happens I will sleep on your door, yes I said that !

Doc: awwww…..Lang,,,, Im sure that wont happen,, but this clinic does not tolerate soliciting …. But there is a shelter down the street around the corner…. …. You know,, just in case

Me: I don』t understand,,, there r a million people out there who dont sleep well but have to drive…. Young parents with a new born bady… college students in exam week…. Ppl who party a lot .. ppl who do nighttime shifts… ppl who spend too much time fooling around with their cellphone before go to bed… I am sure some of those ppl will have a hard time being perfectly alerted all the time when doing the morning commute drive… and I am one of these ppl who care enough to book a appointment with his family doctor to get this right,,, and you report me and get my license suspended… Im not blaming you but dont you agree the result of this 「 report and suspend 「 policy is just more ppl choose to avoid seeing a doctor and thus more drowsy drivers on the road?

Doc: …. Sorry Lang hate to interrupt but looks like a cop is writing a ticket on your vehicle ….

Me: I didnt even mention the auto insurance which more likely than not,,,, wait,,, what,,, what ..cop,, COP?!!??

Doc: looks like you park your car in the spot saved for the disabled,,, I bet its 400 bucks fine

Me: Did u just mention that there is shelter down this street … you mind if you can refer me to that facility…

Doc: Sure. Keep your beard and hair as the way it is now,,, that will help with the interview…

Me: Thx Sara

Doc: You r welcome

Me: Im out, you have a good night

Doc: You too. Take care…. You can take some candies with you at receptions….

Me: that』ll be my dinner.

(END)

Oh by the way,,, its 450