真誠與好奇：與外國人進行更舒適、更自信交流的關鍵

Sincerity & Curiosity: The Key to More Comfortable, Confident Communication with Foreigners

By Michael J. Jordan

BEIJING – What an exciting time to be a Chinese who speaks English!

China is the world』s most-populous nation, and the world』s second-largest economy. It』s also home to the world』s largest number of English-learners – estimated at more than 300 million people.

Today, more foreigners are visiting China, living in China, and doing business with China. More Chinese are also travelling around the world, living around the world, and doing business with the world.

如今的北京-這是一個激動人心的時代啊，如此多的中國人都在使用英語！

中國是世界上人口最多的國家，和世界第二大經濟體。它也是世界上英語學習者最多的國家——估計超過3億人。

今天，越來越多的外國人訪問中國，生活在中國，並與中國做生意。更多的中國人也環遊世界，生活在世界各地，與世界做生意。

While I』ve lived in Beijing since August 2015, before that I lived for nearly four years in southern Africa. I was amazed to see Chinese in every country I visited – all across sub-Saharan Africa.

I also just returned from Europe, where I spent the Christmas and New Year』s holidays. I lived in Hungary many years ago, and have returned there every year since. Each time, I』m struck by how many more Chinese are walking around the capital, Budapest, as either residents or tourists.

雖然我從2015年8月起就住在北京，但在那之前，我在南非生活了將近四年。在我訪問的每一個國家中，我都驚訝地看到中國人的身影——遍及撒哈拉以南非洲地區。

我剛從歐洲回來，在那裡度過了聖誕節和新年假期。許多年前我住在匈牙利，自那以後每年都返回那裡。每一次，我都會驚訝地發現，無論是居民還是遊客，都有不少中國人出現在首都布達佩斯周圍。

Each of you reading this column – Chinese who speak English, and meeting these foreigners, or would like to meet them, in China, or abroad – has the potential to be a 「human bridge」: a bridge between China and the rest of the world. Helping explain China to foreigners, or explaining the world to Chinese.

你們每個閱讀本專欄內容關於「無論在中國，還是國外。成為講英語的中國人、結識外國人、或想結識更多的外國人，」你已經具備潛力成為一個「人文橋樑」：中國和世界其他國家之間的橋樑。幫助外國人解釋中國，或向中國解釋世界。

Or, perhaps you want to have more friends around the world – because that makes your life more interesting, even richer, by learning about different cultures, ideas, habit. Or, maybe you want to do business with foreigners. Or, you simply want to feel comfortable, anywhere in the world. Why not?

或者，也許你想在世界各地交更多的朋友，因為通過了解不同的文化、想法、習慣，你的生活會更有趣、更豐富。或者，也許你想和外國人做生意。或者，你只是想在世界任何地方感到舒適。為什麼不呢？

But I see a challenge for many Chinese: an awkwardness, a discomfort, a lack of confidence. How can I approach a foreigner? How can I strike up a conversation? And if I want more than a shallow, superficial chat with them, how can I develop a deeper, more meaningful conversation?

但我看到許多中國人面臨的挑戰：尷尬、不安、缺乏自信。我怎樣才能接近外國人？我怎樣才能引起一次談話？如果我不想和他們進行膚淺、膚淺的交談，我怎樣才能進行更深入、更有意義的談話呢？

I』ve taught more than 1,000 Chinese students over the past 10 years, from high schoolers to graduate students – today, as a Visiting Professor at both Renmin University and Shanghai International Studies University. Many students tell me: But I』m so shy! Or: I』m so shy about my poor, poor English!

Well, guess what? I myself used to be quite shy. Not very outgoing. And when did that change? At age 22, when I began to work as a journalist – specifically, as a newspaper reporter.

我已經教了超過1000的中國學生在過去的10年中，從中學生到研究生–今天在人民大學和上海國際研究大學的客座教授。許多學生告訴我：我很害羞！我對我的破爛英語很害羞！

嗯，你猜怎麼著？我以前很害羞。不太外向。什麼時候發生了變化？22歲的時候，我開始從事記者工作，特別是作為一名報社記者。

Every day, I would meet people: new people, different people. I』d interview them, asking more and more questions. I became more curious to learn more about so many interesting situations that I』d never known, or about interesting people, who are living interesting lives, or doing interesting things.

每天，我都會遇到新的人，不同的人。我會採訪他們，問越來越多的問題。我變得越來越好奇，想了解更多我從未認識的有趣情景，或是那些有趣的人，他們過著有趣的生活，或者做有趣的事情。

What I found just as surprising is that these people were also answering my questions. Soon enough, I realized why: my sincerity. They could see it in my eyes, that I was sincerely interested to learn more about their lives, their experiences, their thoughts, their feelings, their opinions. They could also sense my genuine curiosity: from all the questions I was asking them.

我感到驚訝的是，這些人也回答了我的問題。很快，我明白了為什麼：我的誠意。他們可以從我的眼睛裡看到，我真誠地想更多地了解他們的生活，他們的經歷，他們的想法，他們的感受，他們的觀點。從所有的我問他們的問題中，他們也能感受到我真正的好奇心。

Moreover, they were often flattered by my curiosity and sincerity. That enabled them to open up.

This is just one of the many lessons and 「soft-skills」 that I』ll share on Zhihu Live and other online platforms. With a topic like 「How to Communicate with Foreigners,」 while other speakers may approach it from an English-teaching perspective, or from a how-to-do-business perspective, I bring a unique perspective: that of a journalist, an interviewer, a storyteller, even of an amateur psychologist.

他們常常因為我的好奇和真誠而受寵若驚。就這樣他們漸漸打開了心扉。

這只是其中的許多經驗教訓和「軟技能」，我會通過知乎LIVE來分享這些經驗。最近我開展了有一個話題是「如何與外國人交流」，其他討論這個話題的人可能從英語教學的角度來看，或從如何做生意的角度來看，兒而我帶來了一個獨特的視角：一個記者，一個採訪者，一個講故事的人，甚至一個業餘心理學家。

From this lecture, you』ll realize it doesn』t matter how shy you are, or even depend on your level of English. More important is your motivation. Are you only interested to meet foreigners, to use them for some reason? Purely to improve your English? Or to secure a business deal? Something similar?

從這次講座中，你會意識到不管你有多害羞，甚至取決於你的英語水平。更重要的是你的動機。你只是有興趣認識外國人，出於某種原因需要他們們嗎？純粹是為了提高你的英語水平？還是為了達成交易？還是類似的事情？

On the other hand, are you genuinely curious to meet foreigners, to create a human connection? To share something about your daily lives, your culture, and so on? Or to explore what』s on your mind, and in your heart? If you are, then many of these people will detect that, begin to trust you, lower their defenses – and 「magically」 open up. Your conversation will probe to depths you never imagined.

另一方面，你真的很想認識外國人，建立一個人際關係嗎？分享你的日常生活，你的文化，等等？或者探索你的想法，在你的心中？如果你是，那麼這些人中的許多人會察覺到，開始信任你，降低他們的防禦，並「神奇」地打開。你的談話將探討你從未想像過的深度。

If you』d like to learn more about this lecture, or about me, or about the many online lectures and courses that I plan to present in the coming months – about writing skills, speaking skills, effective messaging, strategic communications, and all sorts of other 「soft skills」 – feel free to contact me. Xiexie!

如果你想了解更多關於這個講座，或者關於我，或者我打算在未來幾個月內提供的許多在線演講和課程，關於寫作技巧，演講技巧，有效的信息傳遞，戰略溝通，以及其他的「軟技能」，觀音隨時聯繫我。謝謝！

如何舒適自信的用英語和外國人交談？www.zhihu.com