精簡的秘鑰 — 避免重複

本文首發於立文悉通微信公眾號（Transystom）

英文論文貴在簡潔，除了刪掉冗餘的詞，我們還要減少或避免重複性表達。

「A詞的含義包含B詞的含義」

1.

簡化前：The results are plotted graphically. . .

簡化後：The results are plotted ...

* plot本身就是作圖的意思，所以graphically可以去掉。如果要用graphically，可以寫成：The results are represented graphically. . .，但這顯然沒有The results are plotted ...簡潔。

順便提一下，表示「繪製」和survival curves搭配的動詞如下：

• To generate survival curves
• To plot survival curves
• To construct survival curves

2.

簡化前：This arrangement avoids the rebreathing of previously exhaled gases ...

簡化後：This arrangement avoids rebreathing ...

* rebreathing的意思就是吸入已經呼出的氣體，所以This arrangement avoids rebreathing ...即可。

3.

簡化前：. . .fully complies with the requirements needed in . . .

簡化後：. . .fully complies with the requirements in . . .

* requirement和need意思相近，可以去掉needed。

4.

簡化前：. . .operations of varying magnitude, ranging from simple drainage to a full laparotomy.

簡化後：. . .operations from simple drainage to a full laparotomy.

* 「of varying magnitude」、「ranging」和 「from...to...」都是關於範圍的表達，可以簡化成：operations from simple drainage to a full laparotomy。

5.

簡化前：It is possible that our results might have been better had we. . .

簡化後：Our results might have been better had we. . .

* 「It is possible that 」和「might」意思相同，二者取其一即可。

6.

簡化前：Myoclonus and myelinolysis may follow as sequelae.

簡化後：Myoclonus and myelinolysis may be sequelae.

* sequelae必然follow，所以可以去掉follow。

以上內容編譯自 Medical Writing: A Prescription for Clarity, Third Edition (Neville W. Goodman, Martin B. Edwards)

「中英文差異」

1.

錯誤：Although aspirin is effective in RA, but it offers no therapeutic benefit in AS.

正確：Although aspirin is effective in RA, it offers no therapeutic benefit in AS. 或 Aspirin is effective in RA, but it offers no therapeutic benefit in AS.

* 「雖然……，但是……"是中文裡的常用表達，但是在英文里只能二者取其一。

2.

錯誤：In addition, some patients also received potassium supplements.

正確：In addition, some patients received potassium supplements.

* 中文裡，我們會說「此外，部分患者還服用了鉀補充劑」，但在英文中，「in addition」和「also」二者取其一即可。

3.

錯誤：Recent studies have shown that mast cells store and release proinflammatory cytokines including IL-4, IL-6, etc.

正確：Recent studies have shown that mast cells store and release proinflammatory cytokines including IL-4 and IL-6.

* 在中文裡，我們常說「包括……等」，但在英文里，including/such as和etc.不能同時出現。因為including/such as後面接部分內容，表示除了列舉出的內容以外還有其他內容，而etc.也一樣，表示省略了部分內容，所以二者取其一即可。

「同樣的單詞避免多次出現」

1.

Two patients had type I, 7 had type II, and 1 had type III Mirizzi syndrome.

* 為了避免重複，可以僅在句末寫出疾病名稱。此外，除了一開始有patients，後面都省略了patients。

2.

A total of 29 patients completed laparoscopic cholecystectomy, and they all had type I or II Mirizzi syndrome. One patient with type II disease underwent laparoscopic cholecystectomy and common bile duct exploration. Two patients with type III or IV disease were converted to open surgery; the type III patient underwent bile duct end-to-end anastomosis, and the type IV patient underwent choledochoenterostomy.

* 根據情況變換表達形式，如：type * Mirizzi syndrome、patient with type * disease和type * patient。

3.

Of all patients, 26 showed a complete response,12 showed a partial response, and 5 showed no response.

* 除了一開始用了patients，後面把patients全部省略，避免了多次出現patients而顯得冗長啰嗦。

4.

LdT is effective in controlling hepatitis activity in pregnant women with CHB, as it rapidly decreases HBV DNA levels and reduces mother-to-infant transmission of HBV. Its use is therefore beneficial to both mothers and infants.

* 用代詞指代之前的LdT，從而避免了重複性表達。