An Outsider Steps Inside

It was late Spring in Buenos Aires, with my study-away semester quietly coming to an end, I noticed it』s time to say goodbye to the city, to my classmates, to my kind-hearted homestay family, to my excruciating Spanish classes, to those Chinese immigrant friends I met, and to the homeless kids in the shelter I volunteered.

I remembered the day of my departure, I went from Northern Hemisphere to the Southern, from an eastern country to a western one, from day to night, from summer to winter. When I got to the airport, there were people sitting outside McDonalds, they looked at me and shouted 「hablas espa?ol?」, I was timid and turned my eyes away from them. I spent the most grueling three hours waiting for the school shuttle to pick me up. When I got on the shuttle, I was happy to meet those NYU classmates who』re also spending the semester here, yet all of them seemed to have mastered Spanish pretty well, while at that time I didn』t even know how to say 「I don』t speak Spanish」. On the way to school, the sun rose up by inchmeal, and it was so bright, the sunlight came to my eyes in a strange way, with an ineffable feeling striking into my heart--even something so familiar like the sun gave me a sense of strangeness--I realized I』m finally at Argentina, a brand new place with a completely different culture, I』m now an outsider who came inside.

Argentina is an immigrant country, as inscribed in the constitution, everyone who comes with the goal of building this land is welcomed. In this country, every local used to be an outsider, and every outsider who lives here becomes a local. I was once talking with some Chinese immigrants who have lived in Buenos Aires for decades, they all have amazing stories about coming to this country, some decided to stay after attending universities here, some made a living by opening supermarkets, some came here illegally at first but eventually construed to get an ID. I luckily got to become friends with several immigrants. We played basketball every Thursday night in Colagiales, and had a lot of steaks during weekends. One of my friend is called Daniel, he came to Argentina after finishing Junior high school, however, was not able to continue studying directly in this Spanish speaking country, but he managed to learn Spanish by himself, working at a supermarket ran by his family during the daytime, and learnt Spanish after work. We happened to have read the same book—「Sophie』s World」, he read in Spanish and I read its Chinese version though. Now, Daniel is an utterly native speaker of both Chinese and Spanish, and with decent English as well, his biggest concern is no longer whether he is an outsider to this country or would one day he』d go back to China. Daniel is now striving his way to University of Buenos Aires, I』m quite inspired by him, his experience and philosophy of life. If you adjust yourself to the environment, you』ll live on well, as told by Darwin.

The school provided us a lot of opportunities to get around with the local communities. Once we NYU students visited a local university, the campus was converted from a factory. There were 5 of us NYU students, and a bunch of local students, we were treated as guests, visitors, and of course, to some extent, outsiders. We firstly took a group photo with the headmaster and deans, then with the students, and afterwards we were divided into five groups and got chance to talk with its local students. It was a absolutely interesting and amazing chat, they asked me if I were married or not, if Chinese political system better than western democracy, they knew Tian』anmen Square, but for an infamous reason. I also learnt a lot about Argentina from them, I was quite astounded to hear that their universities are free, and they only go to school for either the morning session or the afternoon session for all the school years; There were two girls majoring in plastic surgery, because the industry is flourishing; and most of them also work while attending university. Being and outsider could provide us insights, especially when there are good communications going on, as bystanders we could tell what』s special for cultural reason, and what』s true because of our human-kinds』 nature.

During the time in Buenos Aires, I also worked as a chef in a shelter kitchen, the shelter is home for fifteen children, I went their every Tuesday. The organiser of this NGO told me that kids here are 「abandoned」 by their family for economic reason, but they could actually go back home during weekends, when they』re here at the shelter, we need to show our care and love, making them feel like it』s home. While helping out in the shelter, I started to question myself, how could we define 「homeless」, what is home to you? Is it where your family is? Is it where your culture rooted? Or is it somewhere that once you left your love, your memories and footprints at? The kids left their home and joined their new 「family」, we step out of our home to see this world, we share something similar. Life is filled with leaving and returning home, every departure could be deemed as farewell, every farewell also serves as a new start point, when we come to this beautiful yet evil world, we are a brand new visitor or the so-called orphan, but with the moment we step into the world, we are all outsiders, even though there』re time differences of who came first, but the important thing is we』re inside this land.

As an outsider, I came to this land, and as an outsider I step out. Nonetheless, things I saw will stay deeply inside of my heart, and vice versa, part of myself is also engraved into this world.

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